The makeup artist who created this is an extremely talented sicko. It’s so mind-blowingly gorgeous, but at the same time, it makes me want to vom. I’d really like to see that eye eating a hot dog. Is that weird? It feels right.
I want my hair to look like this, so I’ve been sitting here in front of my makeup mirror for, like, an hour, watching YouTube videos, trying to learn how to french braid. Because nobody ever taught me how to do it, MOM.
My arms feel like they’re going to fall off. How many WW Activity Points will all this exercise get me?
One of my biggest beauty pet peeves is seeing unblended eyeshadow out in the wild. Like, I get it, these things take practice. But, DAMN GURL, YOU GOT A MIRROR OR WUT? How do people not see these things?
It can just look really bad. That’s all I’m saying.
Check out this tutorial: 3 Easy Ways To Blend Your Eyeshadow Like A Pro
The first two blends are especially relevant to the looks most people want to do. That last one, the cut crease, that’s some more advanced shit; use only if you’re ok with people looking at you.
I have a sort of complicated relationship with The Beauty Department. Some of their stuff makes me roll my eyes, some of their stuff makes me scramble for my brushes and a reason to do fancy makeup. Like this “RED CARPET BREAKDOWN” of Rachel Bilson’s look at the premiere of “The To-Do List” has got me wishing we weren’t broke right now, so I could get dressed up and go out.
Check it out HERE.
Hey! If you’re interested in freaking out, go spend your Friday over at Fuck Yeah Nostalgic Beauty Products.
Isn’t it great?!?! Are you roughly my age and can smell and taste nearly EVERYTHING they post?! What’s that about?! Pretty cool/sick, right?! HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Doesn’t make me feel weird or uncomfortable or transported back to high school or anything! Hormones sure were crazy, huh?! Nope. I’m not sick to my stomach/horny at all right now! And that is definitely not how I could sum up my entire teenage experience! Hahaha! What are we talking about??
I’m going to put on some Mazzy Star and lie down. Maybe do some positive affirmations….
I am 31….I do not have algebra today….I have a permanent boyfriend….nobody really does 3-way calling anymore….
This little post at Refinery29 is a great breakdown that should be helpful in choosing the right sunscreen for you. Sunscreen is important on our faces AND chest areas to keep them young and smooooove. I’m especially lookin’ at you, white ladies. There’s a reason black don’t crack and brown don’t break down: Melanin.
Melanin and sunscreen are the biggest reasons why at 31, people think I’m 22. Swear to you, all through my 20s, people thought I was 17-19. Sometimes, it sucks, but it won’t suck when I’m 50 and I look 30. Like my mom, anytime she’s ever shown up to anywhere I’ve worked, the different receptionist ladies would call back and be all, “Sarah, your sister is here,” and then I’d go to the front, and it would be my mom. Which is a totally nice surprise, right?! An unexpected mom hug in the middle of the day is a morale boost. I mean, no disrespect, but my abuelita is an old lady. That’s normal, she’s a grandma! But, she has the smoothest fucking cheeks! Sometimes, I just touch them out of nowhere because they look like cafe au lait colored velvet and my fingers itch for them. Don’t worry, she’s cool about it. We’re basically, like, awesome great homegirls.
TAKIN’ SELFIES WIT MY NANA
Look at this lady! She’s barely got any wrinkles! She looks FANFREAKINGTASTIC. We took this picture at Thanksgiving, she was just telling me how it was fine that the bathroom in my room was a mess because she’s cool about these things. Even though I know she totally isn’t. She’s cool about it for me because SHE LOVES ME AND I CAN DO WHATEVER. My mom is always in awe of the things I can do and say in front of Nana without getting in trouble, because she can’t. I tell her her big mistake was ever NOT swearing, if you just always swear, Nana doesn’t care. Her second big mistake was being born Nana’s daughter and not her granddaughter.
What theee shit were we talking about again? OH YEAH SUNSCREEN!
Whoa! I did not plan for all that. I literally had nothing after “Melanin.” But, now you’ve seen a picture of my Nana!
Check out that link at the top to get help in figuring out what kind of sunscreen would best suit your skin’s needs. Then, one day, your grandchild will write a post, littered with swear words, all about how great your skin looks. The circle of life, people! It’s nature!
The Beauty Department has a REALLY great tutorial on the correct way to use those egg shaped foundation sponges. I mean, I thought I was using mine right, but I’m going to have to reevaluate my technique.
Click through HERE to read the step by step tutorial. You really need to read it to get it right.
I love my Beauty Blender! They apply lighter than a brush, so they’re really great for anyone who wants a dewy, soft finish on their foundation.