General, Links

10 Year Old Me Was Awesome


A piece over on xoJane is giving me so much inner fortification today.

“YOU are OK. I am OK. We are all so fucking OK.”

Fuck yes, we are! Tree trunk thighs, gapped teeth, four eyes and all. Those things I hated when I was 10, are all still with me.

23 years of war waged against my body, and we’re still together. Sometimes, we forge a tentative peace treaty, but then, shots are fired by way of a new bathing suit, or whatever, and I’m back on the front lines. It’s a nonstop battle.

Reading things like this though;

“Love the 10-year-old you who just went for it, awkwardly, blindly, fucking it up, but still going for it, bad hair, bad teeth, bad clothes, and you BELIEVED and you stumbled but there was a part of you that just knew.You just knew how rad you are.”

These are the things that make those tough days a little easier.

“What about me? I’m motherfucking great, that’s what.”



General, Links

Accidental Throwback Thursday

This piece, “20 Beauty and Style Mistakes I Made In My 20s (That I’m Ditching Now That I’m In My 30s)” by Emily McCombs over on xoJane is grossly, embarrassingly accurate.

I’ve never in my life been afraid of lipstick (#13), but numbers 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 10, 11, 12, 15, 18, 19, and 20 are the ugly stories of my 20s.

Let’s break it down:


Cons: Skinny eyebrows, too much foundation, no blush, too short bangs, picture so old it was in an actual dusty photo album

Pros: Red lipstick, cool rep from smoking

Conclusion: It didn’t matter as much back then if my eyebrows were too thin because I had them young boobs. Thank GOD I learned my lessons though. A lot of those mistakes don’t age well.





We launched this site out into the world today! *Xanax break!*

I’m super excited, pretty nervous, really thankful that I have a husband who’s super good at computers, and feeling so loved by all the support my friends have shown. I love every comment, “Like,” retweet and “Share.” I love that nobody told me I should keep my day job.

My day job is television. I play Bejeweled part time, in the evenings.

For years, I’ve bounced back and forth between my two loves – beauty and writing. Always thinking the two were mutually exclusive, I felt I couldn’t pursue either interest full time without having to let go of the other one. Feeling like a Jo AND an Amy, I’ve never been able to choose between the two! As a kid, I would flip back and forth between what I perceived as “looks” or “brains.” Wanting both, but feeling like I had to choose one. In the same year in elementary school, I wrote a book about frogs in love with my best friend (“Rainy Days, Froggy Nights”), and a paper on Helena Rubenstein.

I hated feeling like I couldn’t be smart without rejecting beauty culture, and I hated feeling like I couldn’t love beauty without being “dumb.”

Eventually, I realized these things I love are equally important parts of me. The same reverence I hold for a new notebook, is the same reverence I hold for my Kevyn Aucoin books. I’ve failed at other blogs just the same as I failed as an esthetician.

So, there I was. When faced with the option of trying to build a business as a makeup artist or, buckling down and trying to write the things I wanted to write; I’d put together a full kit of makeup brushes one day, and set up a new blog the next. I’d look up makeup artistry classes in one tab, and creative writing classes in another. I was spinning my wheels and getting on my own nerves! Plus, when I don’t have a creative outlet, I get bored. When I get bored, I get tricky. When I’m tricky, things are crazy for Jason.

I am so happy to realize I don’t have to choose. I am so excited to be able to pour my love of words all over my love of FACE. I’ve been having so much fucking fun!

Thanks for reading! Keep your fingers crossed for me, I love self-sabotage!

And television! Fuck, I love television!