Polish: PARTYBRUISE by FLOSS GLOSS
When I think of cobras, I think of the line in The Cramps song, “Sheena’s In a Goth Gang,” that says Sheena’s in “the Cult of the Cobra.” So, I call this nail look, “Sarah’s In a Goth Gang.”
If you don’t click play on that, I feel sorry for you.
Sarah’s in a goth gang! Sarah’s in a goth gang! Sarah’s in a goth gang nowwwww! I love it when I can easily make a song about myself, I hate having to force it.
Now to the important stuff!
I don’t remember how I discovered Hex Nail Jewelry, and their gold plated brass nail charms, but the first night I was on their site, I had a cart FULL of product. They’re SO boss, and at $1.75 each, it’s easy to pick out a bunch of them. When I finally placed my order, I had some big decisions to make, I was like, “Cobra or scorpion? Cobra or scorpion? BOTH.” I didn’t get the spider though, I have some self-restraint.
My delivery came really fast, so, +1 right away, right? I decided on the cobra first, because I had the opportunity to finally try PARTYBRUISE, and I was already thinking “Sarah’s In a Goth Gang” to myself. I’m always thinking that to myself.
After my two coats of polish and top coat were completely dry, it was time for the main event….
My nails don’t look that great because, FULL DISCLOSURE, I did them with pizza fingers while I was drinking beers, watching Project Runway and talking with my soul sister. It was a nail pizza party! So, basically, two of the best kinds of parties you can have with a friend! Slumber party would be another, key party would be another, NEW YEAR’S PARTY IS ONE! New Year’s Party is like a slumber party and a key party all rolled into one! A chaste key party, but still! I kiss a lot of friends on the lips at midnight, I’ll tell you that much. A lot.
So, the nail charms. Honestly, I fucked mine up a little bit. They make them so hard to fuck up, they’re curved to fit the bend of your nail and everything, but I figured out a way. Here’s what happened, to put them on your nail, you place a tiny bead of nail glue where you want the charm, then, you put the charm on top of the nail glue. Easy. Really easy. Well, I dropped the charm onto the nail glue, then I went, “Mmm….no,” and tried to slide it over a little with my finger. I instantly got my fingertip stuck to the charm and my nail by the still wet glue, yanked my finger up, ripped up the charm by accident, screamed, then had to press it back down, and hope like hell there was enough glue left to keep it stuck to my nail. There was. But, now I had nail glue stuck all over my fingers and the charm. Next time, I’m going to use an orange stick to make adjustments. Hex says you don’t need to put a top coat over the charm once it’s stuck to the nail glue, but I had kind of scuffed mine up with glue, so I threw a top coat over it to shine it up a little. I fucked that up too. I put the top coat on under my ceiling fan, so it went on all thick and stringy.
I think it really speaks to the radness of this nail charm that despite my best efforts, it still looks great. I’ve been wearing this cobra on my nails since Saturday, and it hasn’t snagged on anything, popped off, or lifted. It’s worked out great because my polish is starting to look like it wants to be changed.
To remove the charms, you just pick them off, and wipe the glue residue from your nail with polish remover. Then, you can throw the charm in your jewelry box to reuse!
I love my little baggie of charms, I already have my next manicure planned out!
P.S. When I think of cobras, I think of this too:
P.P.S. If this entry seems super long and meandering, please know I’m on drugs. I need a backeotomy, but I’m on drugs and a heating pad. I *need* to be trying to work up my photo space because my poor backdrop went into the trash. Instead, I’m going to put a bunch of pillows under my knees and wait for someone to come pull the plug because I’m obviously falling apart. See?! Meandering! Shut up, Sarah!