Beauty Tools, Cleansers, Eyeliner, Eyeshadow, Face, Mascara, theBalm

the Balm Balms Away Eye Makeup Breakup Remover Review

balms away

Amazon, $12.99

So, we’ve established that I love to wear a lot of eye makeup and too much mascara. We know this. So, I guess if we really think about it, we also know that I might probably go to bed a lot of nights with raccoon eyes. It’s not for lack of trying on my part. I really do try to get it off! Every eye makeup remover I’ve tried stings my eyes and/or turns my vision cloudy even until the next morning, so I resort to all kinds of other possibilities. I’ve used assorted and varied oils, I’ve tried all kinds of cleansers, I’ve rubbed and rubbed. It’s all hit or miss.

This is a problem because leftover eye makeup can cause those tiny, hard, underground bumps around my eyes. They’re not pimples because they’re not caused by bacteria. They’re called Milia, and they’re actually little cysts comprised of dead skin cells, oil and dirt. Dirt includes leftover eye makeup. I get these little bumps, and then, even though you’re not supposed to, I scratch at them. I can see them under my makeup, and they really rile up my picking tendencies. Your girl wants to party all the time, and a party for me is a really sharp pair of tweezers, an extracting loop, and a clogged pore. BUT THAT’S BAD. I know better. I went to eight months of beauty school, so, yeah, I know what I’m talking about. Call me Pimple Popper, M.D..

I don’t even really try with real eye makeup remover anymore. I tried this one kind of because it looked moisturizing, but mostly because it was half price on HauteLook and I had a credit.

I am so, so happy I took a chance! I love this stuff so much!

balms away detail

As you can see, I’ve been sticking my fingers all in this. It looks gross, but I think it’s good because it gives you a better idea of the product texture. It has a consistency that can best be described as “Crisco-like.” You glob some onto your closed eye, work it in a circular motion for 30 seconds (take some time to focus on your lashes), then, you wipe it off with toilet paper. If you have a bidet, use a kleenex. I was using a cotton round, but for whatever reason, the TP works better. All the makeup should wipe right off, even the mascara and liner under your eyes, and your eyelids will be moisturized! I always do this before I wash my face with my cleanser, so I wash off any excess oiliness then. It’s a dream come true!

I’m removing pigments, I’m removing mascara that doesn’t play, I’m removing black gel liner that promises 24 hour wear. I’M UNSTOPPABLE. This stuff makes me so happy because a lot of times I’ll skip a serious eye look just because I don’t want to deal with a difficult removal process that doesn’t even clean everything off. Now the only thing standing in my way is my own laziness. As usual! That’s ok, I can deal with that.

Buy theBalm’s Balms Away Eye Makeup Breakup Remover HERE.

Benefit, Mascara

Benefit They’re Real Mascara


they'rerealdiptichNo mascara vs. mascara

I need to be up front about my mascara predilections.

The honest truth is, Lord help me, I love a good set of spider eyelashes.

So, maybe I’m not the best person to come to if you want a nice natural look. If you want some good tear stainers though? I’m your gal.

theyrereal2Someone learned how to make diptychs!

I have really long eyelashes, but there are like, 4 of them. So, I require a fair amount of lash fattening in my mascaras. Benefit’s They’re Real mascara sailed right past my MINIMUM PLUMPING LINE and kept on going. The weird/cool little brush was awesome for grabbing all my tiny hiding lashes, and the rounded tip was perfect for coating every corner lash. The formula is nice with great one coat application, and amazing layering capabilities.


The brush/formula combo is so effective, it’s hard to stop building lashes. I’m a bad beauty blogger right now because I lost count of how many coats of mascara I used for these pictures. I guess it depends on what your definition of “one” coat is? I’m going to say three. Three very heavy coats of product.

Benefit’s They’re Real is a really excellent mascara. It has good coverage like the mighty Diorshow, but it doesn’t dry out quickly like that one does. It’s become my makeup bag mascara, and it hasn’t failed me yet.

 Dear Tammy Faye’s Eyelashes,

Please guide my thoughts, my pen, and my mascara wand today.


Buy Benefit’s They’re Real HERE.

P.S. I was at Sephora last week, and I got a small They’re Real for 100 Beauty Insider points.