Speaking of summer, please tell me you’re remembering to wear some sunscreen! Look, I understand, I want caramel thighs, too. But, we gotta put on a leettle bit of sun protection. We all know the more you wear the better, but, I’m realistic. I know you guys. If you’re not going to put on on sunscreen for health’s sake, maybe do it for vanity? That’s why I wear it. The longer people think I’m in my 20s, the better, and there aren’t a lot of 23 year old women walking around with sun spots and wrinkles.
Can I just take a minute and really give thanks for my goth childhood? Blessed be. All those years spent sulking in the shade really saved my skin the usual harm that occurs during the teen years. You can’t get sun damage from sitting in your room and burning incense!
Having a really good time at my 15th birthday party.
In the last 17 years since that birthday, I’ve come around on the sun.
Wait.
17, ALMOST 18, years since that birthday?! The time between the girl in the photo and now is longer than the the time between the girl in the photo and HER BIRTH. That’s so fucking sick. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh no. Things are really on the downhill slide.
Look, I hate to be a downer, but, I’m just realizing that sunscreen won’t turn back the clock. It’s cool though, because, you know, only you have to know the EXACT time on the clock. Not that I’m one of those people who are embarrassed by their age. I’m not. I just want to be 25 forever.
I wrote about this sunscreen last year, and my love for it is holding strong. I really dislike even wearing moisturizers that have spf in them, so that really says something. This sunscreen is light and hydrating, without leaving that gross, gritty, grime feeling. Even better, I have never had any adverse reactions from using this product; no zits, no blackheads, no itchy bumps, no residue.
Since I didn’t really grow up to be an outdoors person, I don’t need a separate sunscreen every day. This sunscreen is waterproof, so it’s pretty much just the couple times a week I’m in the pool AKA day drinking and working on the choreography for our “Man, I Feel Like A Woman” routine with my synchronized swimming partner. I’m thinking about aquatic dance moves, and I do not need to be worried about getting a sunburn, ok? I use this sunscreen for my face, ears, neck, and chest; and I use a regular Coppertone, or whatever, for the rest of my body. So far, so good! My face skin is secure.
You can pick up Neutrogena Clear Face Sunscreen pretty much anywhere. I grabbed my bottle at the grocery store! It ain’t hard to come by! Check it out!
Do people still say other people are “sprung?” Do people still get sprung? Can you be sprung on things that aren’t other people or their crotches? I’m not sure about the answer to any of these questions, so I’m going to take a big risk here when I say I am sprung on this Josie Maran Argan Oil.
BOI-OI-OI-OING!!!!!
That was the sound of me being sprung!! This blog is so high tech and interactive! Now, imagine you can smell lavender Febreze and chihuahua kisses…that’s right…..immerse yourself in the sounds and smells of my world.
I got a deluxe sample bottle of this Argan oil at Sephora a little over a month ago, and I am straight up obsessed. Although the bottle was small, it provided enough oil to find out that I love this product. I’ve been using it about twice a day, morning and evening, since I got it, and it has made a huge improvement in my skin. I actually started using it in the first place because I was desperate. For the last couple months, my skin has been really off; it’s been dry, patchy, really uneven and super dull. My skin even looked yucky under my makeup! Foundation would cake up, or settle into creases. I HAD CREASES. It was bad. On top of THAT, I grew this zit on my chin that was throbbing, underground, and about the size of a pencil eraser.
Wait. Everyone knows what a pencil is, right? How old is everyone? Are pencils obsolete? Probably. Pencils were pretty obsolete 20 years ago. PENS FOREVER!!!
Are pens obsolete? Don’t care! I’ll never stop admiring my own name when written with a fancy pen.
Back to the face oil!
Like I said, since I’ve been using this oil, my skin has made a huge turnaround. It’s soft, smooth, bright, clear, and definitely younger looking. I even went out to fancy dinner and a show last week without wearing any face makeup! I just put on my oil after my shower, threw on some bronzer, and that was it. I looked like a gotdanged natural angel. This oil makes my skin, like, luminous. It works SO WELL, that I keep expecting strangers to come up to me out in public and demand to know what makeup I have on. Then, I’d be all, “I’m not wearing any makeup!” And they’ll be all, “What!? You’re so inherently beautiful! Here. Have a town car, chauffeur, and a modeling contract!” It hasn’t happened yet, but, like I said, I’ve only been using this oil for a month.
Today’s post is going to be all about my current skin care regimen. So, I decided to get right to the point and show you a photo of my makeup free face. There it is. I’m not going to do that thing where I act like I’m super grossed out by my own bare face, because, I’m not. I think I look fine without any makeup on, I just think I look better when I’m wearing mascara.
Right now, I’m pretty happy with my skin. The texture is good, the overall tone is decent. I rarely get blemishes. It’s not perfect, as you can see, I have some dark spots. I also have a little bit of redness around my nose, but that could just be hormonal. I *did* have a giant pimple above my top lip, right in the center last week. It literally popped up out of nowhere. I did my makeup, then I got in the car to leave, and suddenly, there was this huge, pulsing zit. It really gave me a lot of trouble, but it’s gone now. Unfortunately, it left some scarring/discoloration behind. This is a new thing for me. Over the last year or so, my skin has changed a lot, and I think it’s an age thing. My mom has the same problem with scarring and hyperpigmentation when she gets a particularly troublesome blemish. Whatcha gonna do? I just gotta roll with it, and try to find the best products for my changing skin.
These are the products I’m currently using. As you can see, I’m not into buying an entire skin care system from the same line. I think all of our skin is so different, it can sometimes be best to mix and match. You do have to be careful when you do this though, because some ingredients can interact weirdly, or cancel each other out. Do your due diligence and research that shit! I always read tons of reviews and information before I buy a new skin care product. It doesn’t always keep me from making a mistake, but I make them less often. When things go wrong, and they sometimes will, I just pull the new product and go back to what I was doing before. I let my skin settle down, and I try again. It’s an ongoing process, but I enjoy it. Also, I really know everyone’s return policies.
Let’s take a look at my ALL-STARS! LEFT TO RIGHT, Y’ALL!
Fresh Soy Face Cleanser – I did a complete review of this a few months ago, and I am still loving it. It’s such a nice, gentle cleanser. It doesn’t dry my skin out, and it keeps it clean. I’ve had this big bottle since June, and although I’m running low, I think I’ll make it through the end of this month. So, it’s not super cheap, but a little goes a long way. I pretty much only use this once a day, in the evenings. Either with, or without my Clarisonic. Hey, speaking of my Clarisonic…..
MY CLARISONIC! – Remember when I waxed rhapsodic about my Clarisonic? I love this freaking thing so freaking much. I love how it removes allllll my makeup, I love how it keeps my skin so soft, I love how it scrubs all my little face crevices. As far as beauty products go, it’s sort of a big ticket item. But, I’ve said it before, and I’ll keep saying it forever, they’re totally worth it. I use mine every 2-3 days, and pretty much every time I need to clean off a full face of makeup.
Pixi Glow Tonic – This baby is kind of new to the crew. I’ve been using it for about a month, and it’s been a great addition. It’s helped to clear up some rough patches, and my pores have stayed clearer. I use it every night, after I wash my face with my cleanser. I don’t wash my face with cleanser in the morning, I rinse with cool water, and then I follow that with this toner.
Ole Henriksen Truth Serum Collagen Booster & Truth Creme – I bought this set as my first shot fired in the war on my aging skin. I haven’t been using it long enough to see a difference in my dark spots, but I know I like the other things it’s doing. I use the serum first, then follow it with the creme. My skin feels soft and velvety, and it looks plump and bright. I use this system most nights, before bed.
Mario Badescu Rose Hips Nourishing Oil – I’ve written about this here before. At first, I thought this product was kind of strange. But, the longer I use it, the more I love it. Although it’s an oil, it isn’t greasy. It’s got sort of a watery consistency, and it just sucks up moisture. It sucks it all up into your skin. I can’t get enough of how good this makes my skin feel! It has helped immensely with my dry patches, and my flakiness. I use this, in the morning, on its own; and I use it under my moisturizers and treatment oil.
Badger Damascus Rose Antioxidant Face Oil – This is my treatment oil! I use this on the nights I don’t use my Ole Henriksen products, and whenever I feel like my skin needs some deep hydration. It feels nice, the price is right, and it lasts a long time!
Glam Glow Tingling and Exfoliating Mask – I’ve covered this mask here before, too. After I ran through my initial sample, I bought the small jar during the Sephora Friends & Family sale. I’ve used it once a week since then, and it has really helped to keep my skin looking clear. I credit this mask for helping to keep my nose pores under control. Those bad boys act up whenever they can. Jerks.
There it is! The system, the systo, the systrain! It’s all trial and error, guys. You just keep looking and trying and until you find the products that work for you. It takes time, but it’s worth it.
I’m always on the hunt for a faster/easier/more efficient way to do everything. That’s how I ended up trying to shave my legs with baby oil gel. Pinterest said to do it. It clogged the hell out of my razor. It turned my shower floor into a living nightmare.* My legs weren’t any smoother than when I use shaving cream. I had to scrub the shower when I was done. That’s more work. NO DEAL.
Pinterest sent me chasing a lie. Again. I keep at it though. I just can’t help myself.
*My biggest fear used to be smashing my own forehead into the bathroom counter when I flip my hair over while I’m blow drying it. But, then I did that. Now my biggest fear is slipping in the shower to catastrophic result.
I know you’ve all been anxiously waiting to hear the outcome of my coconut oil experiment; and we’ll get to that, but first, let’s take a look back on the road to the finale…
There was that time I followed a random idea that floated through my head and told you guys about it,
In a bad way. Not in a Pauly Shore way. Which is a GREAT way.
This just didn’t work out great for me. Some weird stuff did happen though, so I’ll share.
I think the idea to try this out popped into my head because my hair has been through a lot lately. I’ve been swimming a lot, and I have the suspicion that my Suave coconut conditioner is not up to the task of taking care of that sun and chlorine damage. My hair was feeling pretty dry and poofy. My hair is never poofy. But, you could gather it up in a ponytail, and it was like a big clump at the end. GROSS.
At first, I was super stoked about the way the oil was feeling, because it seemed like my hair was really sucking it up. I’d add more, and it would be gone. All in all, I probably used a little over a 1/4 cup of oil in my hair. Is that too much? In retrospect, it seems like a lot. I have a lot of hair though, so maybe it isn’t? I massaged the oil into my scalp, and all down the entire length of my hair, being really generous at the ends. After my head felt saturated, I pulled it up into a shower cap, and waited for about an hour and a half.
As soon as I started trying to wash out the oil in the shower, I knew I had made a mistake. It was pretty readily apparent that my cleansing conditioner was going to struggle with removing the oil. And, whoa, struggle it did. After a little while, there didn’t seem to be any more I could do, so I got out, hoping that meant the oil that was left was there because my hair wanted it. NOPE! The oil that was left was there because I couldn’t wash it. There was a lot of it. Everything from my ears down was slick with oil. It was weird though because it didn’t feel heavy, or even really sticky greasy. You could easily run your fingers through my hair, and it was light. It was greasy though; all piecey and slick. It was strange. I’d never really felt and oiliness like that.
Instead of getting back in the shower, I braided my hair into milkmaid braids and pinned them up. I was still optimistic that, in the end, everything would work out. Now it was like I was having a long term moisture treatment on my hair! How luxurious! I left it like that for about a day, and then I tried again to wash it out.
This time, I used shampoo.
Here’s where another weird thing happened! The second the shampoo went onto my hair, everything tangled up! It was fucking bizarre! It felt like my hair completely flipped from a slick, over greasy, stick straight mess to a rough, tangled, tumbleweed mess. Scrubbing was a nightmare, everything pulled and hurt. Conditioner barely helped. It was a disaster!
And don’t even get me started on the death trap that was my shower floor while all this was happening.
I dried my hair and I was unimpressed. My hair was shinier and softer, but not soft or shiny enough to make it worth all the mess. You can get faster results from a regular deep conditioner.
If you still want to try it, go for it. As usual, your results will vary. Tread very carefully if you have thin or fine hair, and maybe don’t do it if you have somewhere to be in the same day.
So, there you have it. More bullshit that doesn’t work as well as I’d hoped!
Here I am, post mask, and post shower. Is my hair wet? Is it greasy? NOBODY KNOWS.
Second impression: After all that time trying to rinse the oil out of my hair in the shower, the back of my body is feeling very moisturized.
I might have done this wrong, although, I don’t see how. All our questions will be answered in my next post. Isn’t this thrilling? I put off a trip to Target for this!
Since everyone is already getting their August Birchboxes, I’m going to do a quick review of July’s box.
July’s box didn’t start off great. After I got my shipping notice, the tracking info never updated and the box never showed up. I emailed Birchbox and they said a new one would be sent out to me, and I’d have it within 10 days. 10 days later, I sent another email asking why I still hadn’t received my box. They assured me it was coming. Sure enough, the next day, day 11, it was in my mailbox.
I got a notice that my August box had shipped before I even got my July box!
It’s too bad this month’s box was so late, since what was inside was pretty good.
L-R:
ModelCo Party Proof Matte Lipstick in Peony
What they said: Long lasting, nondrying pigment that won’t come off on your drink (or significant other).
What I say: No fucking way is this matte OR party proof. The color applies beautifully, smooth and creamy, but it comes right off just like any other lipstick. I waited around for it to turn matte, party proof, or something, but it never did. It absolutely left lipstick all over my drinks and my dude. I blotted it down, and that was helpful in keeping the color on my lips, but it was still transferring color. If they hadn’t claimed this lipstick was long wearing like that, I would have been totally happy with it. The dark hot pink color is really pretty, and I like the hydration you get. But, I don’t like being told something about a product that is 100% not true. Plus, my lipstick was broken at the base, so it’s moving around inside the tube a little. I don’t think the heat was very kind to it during shipping.
Marcelle BB Cream Golden Glow
What they said: True complexion illuminator with golden light reflecting pigments, the BB Cream Gold boosts radiance instantly and gives your skin a multitude of skincare benefits.
What I say: Loved it! I was shocked because my skin is notoriously hard to match, but the Marcelle BB Cream Gold blended right in, and made my skin look great. It wasn’t heavy, it evened out my tone, didn’t dry me out, and the golden sheen gave me a really pretty glow. I would really maybe buy this one! I don’t actually wear makeup out to run errands that much, but I’m going to use this little bottle and see how I like it. The moisturizing/correcting combo is pretty enticing.
Benta Berry G-1 Moisturizing Face Cream
What they said: A French best seller, this cream both hydrates and purifies, thanks to blueberry and dead nettle.
What I say: I liked this too! I’ve become pretty oily in my old age, which is totally fine. Oilier skin doesn’t wrinkle as fast! Buuuuuut, I do sometimes feel like I’m just melting off my makeup. This face cream claims to be mattifying. That was a little bit worrisome to me, since mattifying can often translate into drying. When I tried it out though, my concerns were unfounded. Since I’m usually extremely oily when I wake up, I put it on before bed one night, and when I woke up in the morning, my grease had been significantly decreased. My skin felt fine, not dry or gross. I wouldn’t use it all the time, since I don’t really mind my oils all that much, but it would be good for days when you really need a matte surface to lay down your face. Special events and stuff. Like I said, my skin felt fine. I liked it better on its own though. Also, this is the “SUITS” pick, as in that show on USA. So, that’s hilarious. Please call in “Burn Notice” next. I want Bruce Campbell picking out my lipsticks.
Color Club Collection Nail Polish in Put a Pin In It
What they said: This custom rose gold brightens andy summer ensemble – and looks great with a tan.
What they said: We designed these patterned pins to add style to summer hair with minimal effort.
What I say: They’re barrettes. They’re cute, I guess. They’re really hard to get open, and they hurt to take out. I will probably hardly ever, if ever, wear them.
Overall, this was a pretty good box. I’m going to use most of the stuff that came in it, and the samples were really decent sized. The wait was aggravating, so I can’t give it a completely great review this month. But, it’s better than last month, and I really feel like I got my $10 worth out of this box.
One of the best things about having this site is getting to see the summaries of search engine terms that bring people to the Lab Bunny every day. In this grab bag of internet psyche, some of the searches are hilarious, some are disturbing, and some are actually decent. I thought I’d do some little quickie answers to help with these UNSOLVED SEARCH HYSTERIES!!
“is Trader Joe’s body butter good for face?”
I wouldn’t do that if I were you. Body lotions and face lotions have different ingredients and different properties. Even an all natural body lotion is probably going to be much heavier than anything you’d want to use on your face, and they probably aren’t non-comedogenic, so they’ll maybe block your pores. You only want to put lotions on your face that are non-comedogenic and, preferably, made specifically for faces.
“how to UD eyeshadow no glitter fallout”
Those UD glitter eyeshadows are pretty notorious for their fallout. I getcha. They’ve worked to improve their formulas over the years, and I’ve found the fallout issue has improved, too. Improved does not equal no fallout though. These are the best things you can do to minimize glitter fallout from any brand of shadow: 1. If you’re doing a heavy glitter or dark shadow look that you know to be prone to fallout, do your eyes before doing your foundation, powder etc. It’s easier to clean up any mess that way, and you don’t have to redo anything that got smudged, or you had to wipe off. 2. Use a primer, or an epoxy. If you can, instead of layering different shadows underneath, apply the glitter shadow directly to your primered lid. 3. Use a flatter brush to press the glitter shadow onto your eye instead of brushing or swiping. You deposit more glitter that way, and you’re able to concentrate color with less distribution onto your cheeks and around your eyes. 4. Hold a folded tissue under your eye, against your cheek, to catch anything that drops. This works under your bottom lashes too to keep mascara from getting where it shouldn’t. 5. Setting spray.
“boringporno.com”
Sounds great. Good luck with that. Sorry I couldn’t help. Or, maybe I did. Since there aren’t any people f’ing on this site, this would make some pretty boring porno. So, I’m sorry. Or, you’re welcome.
Unsolved Hysteries: SOLVED. Keep the search engine terms coming, weirdos.
Putting oil directly onto your face to improve your skin seems counterintuitive. The first time I tried a face oil, I was a teenager, and I was having some pizza face problems. My mom took me to the Clarins counter, the lady suggested their Lotus Face Treatment Oil, and I was suspicious. Oil to clear up my zits? Right, lady. Why don’t I just eat french fries and chocolate while I’m at it? (Back then, chocolate and french fries were often blamed for acne in Seventeen advice columns. This is pretty much bullshit.)
It took a minute to get the hang of it, and I did, fo sho, make a greasy mess most of the time, but it worked! My skin cleared up.
After that experience, Mario Badescu Rose Hips Nourishing Oil wasn’t gonna scare me off with the dreaded “o” word. I know what’s up. Now, “oil” can join “orgasm,” “oreo,” and “oral” on my list of O WORDS THAT ARE GOOD FOR YOU.
This lightweight and fast absorbing oil is full of vitamin C, so it brightens as well as hydrates. It reduces scaliness and improves texture. I’ve been using it for a couple months now (except for the week I was testing the black soap alone), and combined with my Fresh Soy Cleanser and my black soap, my skin is the best its been in recent memory.
The first time I used it, I was confused by the consistency. It’s not oily at all. It’s practically watery. It was so not what I was expecting, that I thought for sure someone had tried to pull the old switcheroo on me, and I was like, “DAMN YOU, ULTAAAAAA!!!” But, after some furious late night, towel clad Googling, I figured out that nobody had pulled a fast one on me. I was just suspicious, as usual. I always think neighborhood teens are stealing my magazines too.
In the evenings, after cleansing in the shower, I put 4-5 drops onto the back of my hand, and apply it to my face that way – it’s easier than trying to wrangle it on your fingertips. You can wear it under your regular moisturizer, too. I’ve been using it under my Cetaphil moisturizer, and they’re a really nice combination together.
And, hey! If you get it at Ulta right now, you can get a free deluxe sample of the Mario Badescu Drying Cream. That little jar is enough to last you forever! BONUS.
I’m such a sucker for packaging. Look at that little black tube! Isn’t that the sexiest looking hand cream you’ve ever seen?
The circumstances that led to my purchasing this hand cream were kind of a perfect storm. I’ve been working really hard to stop chewing and picking at my cuticles and the skin around my fingers, part of that is keeping my hands lotioned up; I just ran out of my Love + Toast hand lotion, and I got an email notifying me of some credits sitting in some random account on some random shopping site, that I’d immediately forgotten about as soon as I’d signed up.
I went to the site, luvocracy.com, to see what I could buy, and I found sort of a shoppable Pinterest. It’s cool! I searched for “hand cream” and a bunch of options popped up. You buy directly through them, and then they search the internet for a cheaper price or lower shipping on the same product, and if they find one, you pay that reduced price. I’d long been curious about this brand, so I bought it, and a couple days later I got an email letting me know they’d found it for $5 cheaper than what I was originally going to pay. I’m ALWAYS into that.
My delivery was fast, and it came in a pretty black box, all tied up with black ribbon from Barney’s. The lotion itself is totally gorgeous. Silky, lush, and heavily scented with white tuberose, cardamom, hibiscus leaf and jasmine, it’s such a fancy little luxury! I love it! Little beautiful things like that make me so happy.
Go to the site to sign up, or leave a comment and I’ll send you an invite, you’ll get a $10 credit, and you can try it for yourself!
